Road Trip 101: The Prep

A good road trip doesn't just happen. You'll never hear awesome stories around the water cooler from the guy that just "got up and went," mostly because he got fired and isn't at the water cooler every 10 minutes to share his stories over and over again with the same 3 other employees that go to the water cooler every 10 minutes. But seriously, planning is important. Who are you gonna bring? What are you gonna drive? Where are you gonna go? If you don't plan some basics, you'll end up taking someone lame, like, your dog, or your uncle, or that friend of yours you don't really hang out with for any reason other than that he's so-and-so's friend. (Coincidentally, so-and-so probably feels the same way about that guy.) For instance, living near the East Coast, if I set out driving east, I'll only have a one-day road trip, and that's *definitely* not worth taking vacation time for. Especially when I'm gonna have to face that guy at the water cooler who used to work for my boss (whose lame road trip was *obviously* better than mine. Mr. Water Cooler is also Mr. Topper, in most workplaces.)

On the other hand, a good road trip can't be over-planned. If it's not spontaneous, it's really not a vacation at all. If your road trip is planned down to the minute start to finish, you won't actually have any time for the stories that make road trips awesome to happen. That brings me to point number one about road trips:

Road trips are not about the things you plan on doing.

Nobody wants to hear your stories about driving through the Midwest and being bored out of your mind. Nobody wants to see your pictures of the Grand Canyon, Mount Rushmore, or those 300 pictures of desert sunsets. Anyone can Google those pictures, and Google's pictures are always better than yours. Road trips are about the unexpected. Like when you had to push the car 3 miles to find a gas station, or when you found the skunk asleep in your wheel well that one morning after you packed up your tent and were ready to head down the road. Maybe you left one of your party at a rest stop because you forgot him. (More likely because he was annoying as all get out.) (Even MORE likely: You guys were playing Oregon Trail: LIVE and he was unlucky enough to die of Dysentery.) There are thousands of places to stop along the way on your trip, and every one of them is SUPER BORING unless something goes horribly wrong or terribly right. So, plan extra hours into the day, and extra days into the trip, because you never know what's going to happen, and in all of your road tripping, you have to be ready for when the road trip actually happens.

Number 2 point: NOTHING is essential. "Well, what about a car?" A car is a good idea, but a bus can be just as awesome. If you have no friends that want to put up with you long enough to go on a proper road trip, meeting strangers on the road to Tipperary is a great way to go. Food is another item that seems pretty important, but you can do without as long as you know what sort of plants are edible (or if you're a really good mooch.) Extreme examples, but what am I getting at? Don't be so set on taking/bringing/using/doing that you ruin the road trip before you start. Honestly, do you really want to bring that garbage bag filled with Aunt Linda's special caramel popcorn for snacking, if it means leaving your surfboard at home? Hurt Aunt Linda's feelings and SAY NO. (Unless you're one of those guys that prefers popcorn to surfing. If this is the case, we'll all be hoping you're the one that gets killed in the indian raid. Or dies in a buffalo stampede. Or contracts terminal cholera. Long story short, you're road tripping on your own, buddy.) And if you get almost to Yellowstone and see there's a 9 hour queue line just to get in, and you saw some crazy awesome waterfalls you could swim under for free, weigh your options. It's worth it to be flexible; it just might make or break the trip.

OUR TRIP

Myself and two comrades will be driving west after work on July 29th. We'll be touring the country, with several planned stops, including an overnight hike into the Grand Canyon. We're either taking a 1990 Camaro or a Honda Element. We'll each be contributing to this blog as often as possible, along with adding video blogs as we collect them. Our route takes us as far north as South Dakota and all the way down into Texas. KEEP CHECKING BACK FOR UPDATES! Or, subscribe to updates by email by following the link on the right.